Onism


Onism (noun) Origin: Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows | The awareness of how little of the world you will experience.

“The frustration of being stuck in just one body, that inhabits only one place at a time, which is like standing in front of the departures screen at an airport, flickering over with strange city names like other people’s passwords, each representing one more thing you’ll never get to see before you die.”

ETYMOLOGY: Portmanteau of monism (the philosophical view that a variety of things can be explained in terms of a single reality) + onanism (alternative word for self-pleasure).

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Taking a picture of folks on a bus and feeling a little sad that I am not on that bus because they appear to be having so much fun.  Even when I am enjoying exactly where I am and what I am doing.

Being ok with where I currently am (Malabo), but wistfully wishing I was back where I was (Croatia here). So magical.  Sort of the grass is always greener attitude, which I hate.

“I looked through others’ windows
On an enchanted earth
But out of my own window–
solitude and dearth.

And yet there is a mystery
I cannot understand–
That others through my window
See an enchanted land.”
― Jessie B. Rittenhouse’

Greener grasses:  SMB; J-DUB; Planetmom; Brittnjess; Sarah; herman; Liv; meatnpotatoes; Joyce; KG; bratty; ninjawhales; Lyna; Brendan

Schwellenangst


Schwellenangst (noun) Origin: German | shwel·en·ahngst  Fear of crossing a threshold to embark on something new

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Schwellenangst has always been an anomaly to me.  I have spent my life living in a mostly fearless way.  I have embraced the new and have actively sought it out.  Sameness bores me.  I have lived a life that has required me to be quick at making decisions that have hurled me into the new.  Spontaneity has described the essence of me and is what and who I have been.

I think that this is why the last year has been so hard on me.  As much as not being able to be spontaneous and come and go as I please, there has been some comfort in being isolated, locked inside, living silently in my safe cocoon solitude with no interference.  It has even been refreshing to be slightly bored.

Though I am looking forward to some upcoming changes that might bring me back to my normal.  In the same manner, for the first time in my life I am feeling a surge of schwellenangst at all of the newness that is bound to emerge as I enter this new normal.

“Fear and anxiety many times indicates that we are moving in a positive direction, out of the safe confines of our comfort zone, and in the direction of our true purpose.”
― Charles F. Glassman

“We do not fear the unknown. We fear what we think we know about the unknown.” – Teal Swan

Schwellenangst in others: Lauren; Moments; Thoughtsthatpersist; kaushal; Christine; Joseph; Thelen; Binnzy; Orlando; Perditus; Eddie; Alexander; Elaine; John

Saudade


Saudade (noun) Origin: Portuguese | sɐw’dadə A nostalgic longing to be near again to something distant or someone that is distant.

I am nostalgic about almost every place I have ever been.  I miss the memories of the traveling I have done, of the places I have seen, of the people I have met.  I took a trip to Croatia with my youngest daughter a few years ago and it really was an amazing time.  Sure there were the mommy/daughter moments that were outrageously annoying.  However, I prefer to only remember the best parts of that trip.

I think it’s easier to remember … and to forget the annoyances of traveling with family than it is regarding issues that arise while traveling with friends. For me, it is because family has known you forever and you have your patterns and histories of the good and the bad.  For every bad there is a good.  Especially with your children.  My dream has always been to show my children the world.  Luckily for me, I have been pretty successful at that.

Though I do love traveling with friends.  There is always a feeling of saudade when my children or family are not around.  I feel like I have let them down by not having them participate in my adventure.  The re-telling is never the same as the being there.  Also, there is a freedom of being able to comfortably be at your best, your worst, your goofiest, your happiest, and even your saddest.  I am looking forward to more travels with them, more memories with them, and really, just being nearer to them.

“That strange sense of being different stays with you. You long to be with people who are more like you. Similarities are what bonds humans than differences, Beevitha.”
― Husna Mohammad

Saudade:  Irina; Iamfierce; candk; seeking; julia; zeki; simon; Asakura; agogo; chronosfer;

Yūgen


Yūgen (n.) – Origin: Japanese – Definition: An awareness of the universe that triggers emotional responses too deep and mysterious for words.

I try to honestly and emphatically embrace the mysteries that surround me.  I usually prefer  taking photos of people.  I love to look back on them and wonder what they were thinking.  If they were happy or sad or just sitting there empty minded in a way that I rarely find myself in.  However, sometimes I will catch an image of an object or place that will trigger in me an emotional response that is very difficult to put into words. When i look back on these photos, i can distinctly remember the silence, the heat, the cold, the dampness, and sometimes the awe of that moment.

I don’t know if these images created an awareness of the universe, but they definitely made me feel.

There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; you can live as if everything is a miracle. The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt is awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed.

Albert Einstein

Ukiyo


Ukiyo (noun) Origin: Japanese | The floating world – Living in the moment, detached from the bothers of life.

A hard translation of this word dates back to Japan’s Edo-period as it describes the urban lifestyle, and a famous related word is ukiyo-e or Japanese art paintings of the ‘Floating World’ or of our fleeting life and transient world.

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I was fortunate enough to take a vacation with my daughter to Croatia.  I let her plan the entire trip.  Where we stayed, where we ate, what we did.  It was one of my favorite trips.  I didn’t have to make any decisions (only had to pay for everything.. haha)

I sat on this very cool spot for hours in Zadar, Croatia.  We visited this place again and again throughout the day because it was just interesting and beautiful.  It was mesmerizing.  Next to it was an ocean organ.  They were steps that went into the water and when the waves came up it would sound like an organ. Seeing people walk across this at different times of day made it seem like you were in another world.  At night it would light up.  I think it was one of our favorite places in Croatia.  The entire country was amazing and one day I will go back.

Croatia: inavukic; Dave; slovanians; lidija; michael; Ellen; viveka; maris; Isaiah; luke; kylie; isaac; Cameron; nathaniel; tina; ahoyne; somewhere; justtravel; chester

The Sea organ is an architectural sound art object located in Zadar, Croatia and an experimental musical instrument, which plays music by way of sea waves and tubes located underneath a set of large marble steps.

zadar